The Force is Everything...

I prayed... almost without hope. I cast my wishes to the winds to join with the Force. I begged of the gods. I had no idea they were already at work. I had no idea the Force was already in motion. I should not forget... that the Force is everything... and balance is its goal.

Max contacted me today.

He is working on medic training. He hasn't done this in ages.

I was out on Tattooine. I decided to go back and see my first haunts... to try to find myself again. It was a bit strange. So much has changed. Alliance personnel guard the city of Mos Eisley. I passed one as I parked my sorosuub. I walked into the med centre. It smelled the same. It smelled like every other med centre... with the exception of the Tattooine dust scent overlaying everyone's clothing.

I walked past the bazaars and into the cantine. I touched the chair I sat in the first day I arrived and met Jakob... while I waited for Blimey. Blimey... I still wonder what has become of him. He seems to have evaporated like a ghost. Sometimes I wonder if that is all he was. I stood for a while in the spot where Brem danced and talked with me all night. *sad smile* I watched some of the dancers, listened to the idle talk, and looked up people's bios. Something I used to do. And one of the reasons the Alliance hired me. I watch and listen... alot. And no one every really notices me. Just another anti-social drifter. A hunter hoping for some training or a decent contract.

I hiked out to where I used to have a house with a vendor. There is a new house with vendors inside on that very same spot now. Nexus Mall. I looked back over the hill towards Mos Eisley again as the wind tossed up some sand. It feels almost like ages and ages ago. But it hasn't even been a year. There are still 4 months to the one year mark of my initial freedom. Strange. I wish I could take this journey with Max. But instead I hiked back to Mos Eisley and started training with my VK against some of the Desert Demon gang members. Venting some pent up frustration and energy, practicing focus and strikes... training. Deomo would have been proud. Max would have watched as though I was dancing. It feels like dancing.

I was startled me from my focused fight. I founda med that gives a bonus for pistoleers and contacted Maxell. He said something shocking... that... he would likely never be picking up a pistol again. *!!!* He has noticed something... wrong... wrong with himself, for himslef. When did this happen? I stood stunned so long that a Desert Demon knocked me down.

Gods! Thank you! I cleaned up the gang members and dashed back to my ship. Max and I will meet at his and Avios' new hall, the one with the plants Max has been growing. At last! I met a rebel friend of Max's and led him to get placed on leave as he was retirning. It was a quick drive to Wanders End's small base and back.

I then got to just sit... sit on a blue rub and talk with Max. Talk. Hug. Embrace warmly. We are not sure if avoiding the gunfighting will help, but it seems to so far. Who knows what the future will bring. He will help me to cleanse the temple later today. I won't have to do it alone.

I whispered my feelings to Maxell. *I love you*

Ebe also met us. But I was growing exhausted. I am so out of shape. I headed to the tample and curled up in the indoor camp that Max has created for me. And I slept... well... for the first time in a long time. The nightmares were even quiet for a rare change. They usually disturb my sleep without me able to remember much of them. But this time... I slept well. And Max's scent drifted in with him.... *peaceful*